#GauchoStrong

I went to UCSB from 1995-1999. My time there was filled with friends, parties, the beach, academics, classes, bicycling, running, goofing off, walking, drinking beer, singing karaoke, fighting, crying, drinking jungle juice, dancing, meeting new people, making friends, dressing up, walking in heels, eating toast, drinking tea, making turkey dinner, watching 90210, Friends and South Park, going to our neighbor's house, going to our other neighbor's house, showing visitors around, consoling friends after breakups, trying to surf, working at the UCen, seeing Stephen Hawking, playing with sea urchins, loving Developmental Biology and basically not wanting to leave. Although I've been gone for 15 years, not a day goes by that I don't think about my time there and formative, powerful, and amazing. Bad things happened, but nothing like a mass shooting. Nothing like the insanity that the UCSB students have to deal with now.
My heart is broken. IV was always our spot - a place for the students to hang out, and be. We weren't part of Santa Barbara, we didn't have to dress up to go anywhere. It was OK to wear our PJs to the market, we could let our guard down, and be ourselves. We were safe. Our friends watched out for us. Everyone walked everyone else home. We watched out for people who weren't our friends - always trying to make sure everyone got home safe. We walked DP, going in and out of the houses having parties. We burned couches. We dressed up for Halloween. Nobody died. Guns were not even part of the conversation.

I'm not sure what else to say.

I'm just heartbroken. So incredibly heartbroken.